Today is a strange anniversary. We don’t even know if we should mark it. After all, making a special day only seems to give importance to an act of terrorism that happened to have occurred on this day. I suppose we mark it because of how the day seems to be a kind of marker. We think in terms of before and after. We remember where we were when the towers fell. Ten years later, we hardly know what to say – only that it seems to have cost so much.
By accident, the words we hear seem to draw attentions to what we feel, but not in the way that we would wish. The reading from Exodus reminds us of God’s deliverance of the children of Israel at the Red Sea. Do we really want to cheer when God smites our enemies? Then Paul urges the Christians in Rome to respect one another. “Welcome those who are weak in faith, but not for the purpose of quarreling over opinions.” If only we wouldn’t quarrel over opinions! Where has our tolerance and understanding gone?
Finally, Peter asks, “Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” That seems generous. Jesus answers seventy-seven times! Then he offers a parable on forgiveness. A certain slave owed his master several millions or even trillions. He begged for mercy and the master forgave him. Then this same slave finds another slave who owes him a much smaller sum – a few hundreds. He demands payment despite the forgiveness he has just received. Word gets back to the master, who angrily arrests the unforgiving slave and throws him in jail forever. We are given the warning, “So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
It’s easy to repeat the formula of forgiveness. We forgive as we have been forgiven. We are forgiven as we forgive others. Doing it is much more difficult. How do we forgive? Is forgiveness a kind of amnesia where we forget the evil that has been done to us? Or do we forgive with a little addendum; “I can forgive but I can’t forget!” (Which sounds suspiciously like not forgiving.) We can get ourselves tied up with trying to imagine forgiving evil people. Can we forgive Hitler? Can we forgive the 9/11 terrorists? What does it mean to forgive? What does it mean to forgive in such a way that we are not merely going through the legal motions so that we can say we have forgiven so that we too can be forgiven?
God extends forgiveness because God wants to have a different relationship with us. God wants us to be free of those things that kill us. God wants us to let go of the things that keep us bound to our failures and our fears. God wants us to live differently. God for-gives us. God gives us something before we have deserved or earned it. We are like that first slave who has been forgiven millions. Our response should be to walk with a spring in our step and gratefulness in our hearts. We will want to treat others the same way.
Our problem is that we try to forgive without imagining a new relationship. We’ll forgive if the other person is sorry. We’ll forgive if the other person makes it right. This kind of forgiveness is not really forgiveness. We are simply releasing others from their punishment if they have shown remorse and good behavior. Instead, forgiveness is all about working out a new way of living together. It may need restitution. It may require steps that restore trust. It may require difficult conversations where we speak our minds to each other and risk discovering how we may be complicit in the disagreement. True forgiveness may require our willingness to admit fault.
Forgiveness does not forget evil. The evil act remains evil. The consequences of any evil act will remain. Forgiveness doesn’t forget what has happened, it is only seeking a different path from the inevitable eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth (which Gandhi said makes the whole world blind.) In some cases of abuse, the only path of forgiveness is to break the relationship so that the weak are safe and the abuser is forced to face his or her abuse. True forgiveness is not about forgetting and letting someone off the hook. Forgiveness comes when we can all admit our guilt and seek to be restored. It is the seeking for something different that is at the core of forgiveness.
Forgiveness takes time. It takes time to know how we have been hurt. It takes time to learn what has driven another to sin against us. It takes time to discern how we might live differently. It may require several steps to forgive the depth of sin. It may take seventy-seven times. It may take our whole lives. We may have to spend our lives in perpetual forgiveness towards those who hurt us. It may take our whole lives to continually discover how God forgives us.
This church has had its share of wounds that require forgiveness. You know first hand how difficult it is to speak the language of forgiveness in the messy and complicated problems of life. There is more than enough blame to share all around. There are wounded people everywhere. It is not enough to separate wrong from right. We have to choose a new path. We have to decide to forgive each other and love each other.
Perhaps this is why we have blundered violently across the globe. We have been on a ten-year search to get the guy who did it. We have spent money on weapons and security devices. We are still anxious. Our world and its future are uncertain. We have found no answers. Perhaps we need to stop defining the future in terms of those who hate and destroy. Perhaps it is time to seek relationships with those who want to build a new world. Maybe it’s time to work with those who want freedom instead of plotting to kill those who want to deny it to others.
Ten years after the terror attacks seems to soon to proclaim forgiveness and restoration. But it is not too soon to choose how we live. We can choose to give thanks for the blessings of God’s love. We can choose to live with grateful hearts. We can seek to create life-giving relationships with strangers – and discover new blessings from other children of God.
By accident, the words we hear seem to draw attentions to what we feel, but not in the way that we would wish. The reading from Exodus reminds us of God’s deliverance of the children of Israel at the Red Sea. Do we really want to cheer when God smites our enemies? Then Paul urges the Christians in Rome to respect one another. “Welcome those who are weak in faith, but not for the purpose of quarreling over opinions.” If only we wouldn’t quarrel over opinions! Where has our tolerance and understanding gone?
Finally, Peter asks, “Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” That seems generous. Jesus answers seventy-seven times! Then he offers a parable on forgiveness. A certain slave owed his master several millions or even trillions. He begged for mercy and the master forgave him. Then this same slave finds another slave who owes him a much smaller sum – a few hundreds. He demands payment despite the forgiveness he has just received. Word gets back to the master, who angrily arrests the unforgiving slave and throws him in jail forever. We are given the warning, “So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
It’s easy to repeat the formula of forgiveness. We forgive as we have been forgiven. We are forgiven as we forgive others. Doing it is much more difficult. How do we forgive? Is forgiveness a kind of amnesia where we forget the evil that has been done to us? Or do we forgive with a little addendum; “I can forgive but I can’t forget!” (Which sounds suspiciously like not forgiving.) We can get ourselves tied up with trying to imagine forgiving evil people. Can we forgive Hitler? Can we forgive the 9/11 terrorists? What does it mean to forgive? What does it mean to forgive in such a way that we are not merely going through the legal motions so that we can say we have forgiven so that we too can be forgiven?
God extends forgiveness because God wants to have a different relationship with us. God wants us to be free of those things that kill us. God wants us to let go of the things that keep us bound to our failures and our fears. God wants us to live differently. God for-gives us. God gives us something before we have deserved or earned it. We are like that first slave who has been forgiven millions. Our response should be to walk with a spring in our step and gratefulness in our hearts. We will want to treat others the same way.
Our problem is that we try to forgive without imagining a new relationship. We’ll forgive if the other person is sorry. We’ll forgive if the other person makes it right. This kind of forgiveness is not really forgiveness. We are simply releasing others from their punishment if they have shown remorse and good behavior. Instead, forgiveness is all about working out a new way of living together. It may need restitution. It may require steps that restore trust. It may require difficult conversations where we speak our minds to each other and risk discovering how we may be complicit in the disagreement. True forgiveness may require our willingness to admit fault.
Forgiveness does not forget evil. The evil act remains evil. The consequences of any evil act will remain. Forgiveness doesn’t forget what has happened, it is only seeking a different path from the inevitable eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth (which Gandhi said makes the whole world blind.) In some cases of abuse, the only path of forgiveness is to break the relationship so that the weak are safe and the abuser is forced to face his or her abuse. True forgiveness is not about forgetting and letting someone off the hook. Forgiveness comes when we can all admit our guilt and seek to be restored. It is the seeking for something different that is at the core of forgiveness.
Forgiveness takes time. It takes time to know how we have been hurt. It takes time to learn what has driven another to sin against us. It takes time to discern how we might live differently. It may require several steps to forgive the depth of sin. It may take seventy-seven times. It may take our whole lives. We may have to spend our lives in perpetual forgiveness towards those who hurt us. It may take our whole lives to continually discover how God forgives us.
This church has had its share of wounds that require forgiveness. You know first hand how difficult it is to speak the language of forgiveness in the messy and complicated problems of life. There is more than enough blame to share all around. There are wounded people everywhere. It is not enough to separate wrong from right. We have to choose a new path. We have to decide to forgive each other and love each other.
Perhaps this is why we have blundered violently across the globe. We have been on a ten-year search to get the guy who did it. We have spent money on weapons and security devices. We are still anxious. Our world and its future are uncertain. We have found no answers. Perhaps we need to stop defining the future in terms of those who hate and destroy. Perhaps it is time to seek relationships with those who want to build a new world. Maybe it’s time to work with those who want freedom instead of plotting to kill those who want to deny it to others.
Ten years after the terror attacks seems to soon to proclaim forgiveness and restoration. But it is not too soon to choose how we live. We can choose to give thanks for the blessings of God’s love. We can choose to live with grateful hearts. We can seek to create life-giving relationships with strangers – and discover new blessings from other children of God.
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